Monday, December 8, 2014

In which I reveal Illuminati secrets on Quora

Ever since I installed the Quora app on my personal tablet, I've been more active in Quora - reviewing questions, spouting off answers, and the like. There aren't a lot of items posted about my business interest (biometrics), but there is certainly a lot of traffic on other topics that interest me.

Including, of course, the Illuminati.

Not too long ago, someone asked this question:

How would one know if one is being recruited by the Illuminati?

How can I avoid missing the signals. How do I convince myself that I am not being pranked upon? How is one assured of the genuine-nature of the request (approach?) if at all?

This is obviously a major concern for a lot of people, and many respectful Quora members gave the question the serious answer it deserved. One excerpt:

The first rule of the Illuminati is that no one talks about the Illuminati.

I also answered the question, but my answer needs to be placed into context. A few days before seeing this particular question, I had read two accounts of the joys of working at Radio Shack. I am unable to find either of these now, but I can summarize both of them as follows: working at Radio Shack, especially during the holidays, stinks. One account described how a mall Radio Shack had to open really really early on one holiday, but that no shoppers arrived for an hour or two. A couple of employees just up and quit during the long day, and corporate eventually authorized the store to close early, after it had sold hardly anything.

Anyway, with these in mind, here is how I answered the question about Illuminati recruitment.

Let me guess. You thought "Radio Shack" was an electronics retailer. I will admit that the displays in the temples - I mean the stores - can be convincing, but the fact that there were no customers should have given you a hint that the "cashier job" was not what it seemed.

Yes, I know that I've revealed terrible secrets there, but how do you think that I was able to join the Radio Shack Battery Club in the first place? They didn't just hand those memberships out.
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