An explanatory note to Europeans

Dear Europe,

Some, but not all, businesses will be closed in the United States on Tuesday, November 11 for the holiday that we call Veterans Day (and that we used to call Armistice Day, back when we thought that the World War was the war to end all wars).

Yes, I know that you call it Remembrance Day, but we do our remembering in late May, on the day that we call Memorial Day.

This gives us a holiday in May. No, most of us don't celebrate May Day, because we're not a bunch of Commies.